You need what?

I got a call yesterday from my boss at work.

I only work during tax season and maybe a couple small projects here and there, but for the rest of the year I am pretty out of touch. I check my work e-mail periodically but for the most part I am "out of the loop". Anyway, next Tuesday is the annual "State of the Firm" meeting. I usually don' t go because it happens to fall at that time of the year when I am most out of touch and I feel kind of funny showing up.

So, the conversation goes like this:

John: Are you coming to the "State of the Firm" meeting?

Me: Well, I really hadn't given it much thought.

John: I need to know because you are getting something if you are going.

Me: Getting something?

John: I think you are here 20 years now so there is an award for that.

Me: So, should I go?

John: It is up to you. There are going to be a couple of big announcements.

Me: So, if I want to be "In the know" I should go.

John: Yes.

Me: OK, I will be there.

John: Great, then we need a picture of you.

Crap! If I knew that I would have said no. The last thing I want at this "State of the Firm" meeting is to have to look at a large picture of myself on a big screen as part of a freaking slide show! And do you think I have a decent picture of myself? No! Of course not! I am 20 pounds overweight and most of the pictures with me in them also have my kids in them. And many of them were taken after I had just finished hiking up a mountain or getting out of the lake having been dragged around on a tube behind a boat!

So, this morning, before I started laundry, grocery shopping, etc., I took a shower, did my hair, make-up, put on a decent outfit, and had Mark take a couple of pictures of me. Damn near made him late for school -- it's not like the first one (or even the second one) came out decent! My little photographer managed to get one that will do.

It's not great, but hey, we were working with a tight deadline and it's the best I could do!

If I'm not crazy, I sure do look it!

I drove Mark to school this morning as I usually do. Yes, it is right down the street less than two blocks away and he should walk. Unfortuntely, we are usually running late. It is also freezing out this week (but that isn't the real reason I drive him -- I'm just trying to justify a little more). And besides, I have to go out in the car to drive Daniel to school anyway, so I might as well just drop Mark off on my way. (Yes, more excuses). Bottom line -- it is easier to just fly up the street in my car, wave to the crossing guard as we drive by, and slow down a bit in the school parking lot so that he can jump out.

Anyway, this morning, as always, we got in the car, flew up the street, waved to the crossing guard as we drove by, and I slowed down a bit in the school parking lot so that Mark could jump out. As I watched him walk down the sidewalk to the door I noticed that something just didn't look right. Jacket on? Check. Hat and gloves? Check. Lunchbox? Check. Backpack?.....Backpack?...Backback? Nope. He had left the house without his backpack!

So, I pull forward, put down the window and yell "Hey, Mark! You don't have your backpack!" Oops! Back in the car he gets. We fly back up the street, wave to the crossing guard as we drive by, into the driveway, into the house, grab the backpack, back in the car, back out the driveway, back up the street, wave to the crossing guard as we drive by, and slow down a bit in the school parking lot so that he can jump out.... this time WITH his backpack!

Then I have to drive back past the crossing guard AGAIN and wonder what she is thinking. When in reality I know what she is thinking. She is thinking "That woman is a freaking lunatic!"
(PS I skipped the wave on the 4th drive by -- it just didn't seem necessary)

An 89!!!

Well, Brooke had an Algebra test last week -- Thursday and Friday -- a 2 day test. Very scary! The last algebra test she took she got a 61. Yup, you read it right. A 61. Yes, that is an "F". And that was her 1st grade of the 2nd marking period. Yes, an "F" to start things out right on the wrong foot.

Since then I have found a tutor for her -- a high school girl who isn't going to send us into bankruptcy with her fees. I have relaxed just a bit -- I am no longer carrying on like a lunatic (well, not as much as I was before). And Brooke has studied her little butt off. I am very proud of the time and effort she has put in.

It paid off! The teacher posted the grades to the online "gradebook" today and I almost flipped when I saw an average of 70.8. Yes, I know a C- isn't that great, but knowing what I know about this teacher and how difficult she is and knowing where we started this marking period -- I was thrilled! So, I drilled down to the details of the algebra grade and there it was...an 89, a B+!!! All I have to say is.... Woo hoo!! Way to go, Brooke! There is hope!

So, what did I do next? (After I shared the good news with Brooke, of course) I e-mailed her tutor to see when she can meet with Brooke this week. We have a mid-term coming up, you know! Onward and upward!

Where does he get this stuff?

The other day I was playing Wii with Daniel. We were playing Super Mario Kart -- the driving game with the steering wheel -- very fun. Anyway, I am not that good and after a while it actually makes me a little motion sick. So, after 4 or 5 races, which I lost having fallen off a cliff too many times to count, I was done and suggested to Daniel that he play with Mark. He replied with "No way, he has mad skills. I don't want to play against him!"

Mad skills? Where the heck did he come up with that!? I think it is "big kid" terminology for being very good at something. But it was so funny coming out of his little 4-year old mouth.

It also made it crystal clear to me that the only reason Daniel prefers playing with me is that I stink and he can kick my ass!

Cleaning

My friend, Carol, and I have come up with an excellent plan for the mundane chore of house cleaning. About 2 years ago, we complained to each other that we never got the whole house cleaned at once. It just took too long. We would dust and vacuum part of the house one day, clean the kitchen and a bathroom the next day, maybe clean the other bathroom(s) another day, dust and vacuum the bedrooms another day... Long story short, by the time we got to the end of the process, the first rooms cleaned were a mess again. (In reality, I had really gotten to the point that my cleaning was pitiful at best -- I didn't do it often enough and I didn't do such a hot job when I did.)

So, we decided to do it together. Once a week we get together and clean one house. Today, for example, we are cleaning hers. I will dust and vacuum and she will clean the kitchen and the bathrooms. When we are here next week, she will dust and vacuum and I will do the kitchen and the bathrooms. (I'm sorry, but I wouldn't wish cleaning my bathrooms on my worst enemy -- I have 4 boys living in this house, three of them under the age of 12. Things get ugly in there! But that is a story for another post.)

Anyway, the best part of this arrangement is that we have lunch (or breakfast, depending on timing) together. Whoever's house is being cleaned supplies lunch. So, we clean (and chat as we go) and when we are done we enjoy lunch together. The whole thing takes about 2 1/2 - 3 hours. Our houses are cleaned every other week -- the whole house -- and we get to visit and chat and eat. Brilliant!

The only down-side is that I will spend most of the afternoon cleaning and then come home to a messy, dirty house. But, next week will be my turn!

Back to school!

Would it be completely wrong for me to put the bottom of my foot on each child's butt as they head out to school tomorrow and push them out the door?

Let me just say that 12 days is a long break! It has been fun and we have been busy, but it is time to get back to a routine. I know, in a few days I will be complaining of the crazy routine, but when it is gone I miss it. And I fear that the imprint that Brooke's butt is making on the couch will become permanent and that the Wii will completely burn out! And if Kevin says "I don't know what to do" one more time I am going to scream!!!

So, not everyone was happy

I need to * a statement from my last post. I said "Everyone was happy." I meant "All of the kids were happy." Eric informed me, after reading my post, that, despite the fact that he asked for them, he didn't really want the nose hair trimmers that badly. And, he didn't get the undershirts and underwear that he asked for.

You now see what I'm dealing with when I ask him what he wants for Christmas!

(Seriously, I did get Eric some decent gifts -- a couple books, the woodworking book he asked for, an Under Armor fleece that I needed to tell him last night to put in the hamper because he had been wearing it too long, including to bed the night before!, some sweat pants and a desk organizer with a picture on it from Snapfish. His Christmas wasn't that bad! He did give me $100 limit to work with -- and you know how seriously I take those Eric-imposed limits. Although nose hair trimmers aren't as cheap as one would think. Hmm. Go figure.)